Between Sadie and several of my other hilarious friends, I am always laughing. Well, usually…
What I am saying is I have funny friends. And we say funny things. We have funny conversations.
Betony I’m fooling myself in thinking wearing mascara to therapy is a good idea aren’t I?
Betony Well. YOLO?
Jasmine Best fucking text convo ever.
Betony I’ll be doing raccoon impressions on the corner of West & Dickson. Peace out.
Jasmine You realize I am going to blog this, right? It deserves to be famous.
Betony I am fodder for you my dear.
Jasmine You are so much more than fodder.
Betony Haaay. I ‘m sending you and instant bucket of calmies.
Jasmine What the hell is that?
Betony Its like an imaginary smoothie if chill out you get to pour on little folk who are running amok. I’m using loads today.
Betony I made it up.
Jasmine Lol, Am I running amok or are you?
Betony Well my kids are, aren’t yours?
Jasmine A bit. I am more bored than they are.
Betony Hand print turkeys? That’s my last resort. Heh
Jasmine Think we are headed to the movies…
Much much later
Jasmine Happy white people stole more shit that didn’t belong to them day
Betony Sweet potato pieeeeeee
Jasmine Pecan Pie over here
Betony Have you seen the “girl you’re giving me goosebumps parody on YouTube yet?
Jasmine My hands smell like ham
Betony That could be considered risque in some circles
Jasmine Not because I put my hand in my vagina
Jasmine … wait. My vagina does NOT smell like ham…
Betony That is not at all what I was thinking.
Betony I am happy for you?
Betony Ham Wallet.
Jasmine Ham wallet lol!!
Betony I think the whole quote is “vulcanize the whoope stick in the ham wallet.”
Jasmine Lol. Barf.