Huzzah! International Women’s Day. What are we celebrating? All things vagina! Woohoo!… which as it turns out are INTERNAL. I know we call the “down there area” vagina, but it isn’t. Your goods, va jay jay, lady garden, tender flower, and all other euphemism (ad nauseum) is called VULVA. IF there is one day to get this right, it is today, International Women’s Day.
Which brings me to why International Women’s Day, for me, is *actually* about raising my sons. “Yeah, yeah yeah,” you think, “yet ANOTHER day that is supposed to be about women, and here we are talking phallus.” Well. IF you are a MOTHER of a SON sit down and lets have a chat.
International Women’s Day, of course, is a day for me to reflect on motherhood, womanhood, the women who helped raise me, and what my life is like with my lady plumbing. It is ALSO about me raising my sons, because they can grown up shaped by the world OR by me to be several different kinds of men.
SO on International Women’s Day I am embracing one of the most POWERFUL positions I have as a woman. I am a mother to BOYS who will grow up to be MEN. I am exercising my power to teach my sons, Isaiah and Tobias, to be feminists.
I vow to teach them that women are beautiful and complicated PEOPLE who have the same power and ability as men. I vow to teach my sons that they are in charge of their bodies, thoughts, and actions as women should have the right to be in charge of their bodies, thoughts, and actions. I vow to teach Isaiah and Tobias that “feminine” and “masculine” is a wide range of things and are all acceptable definitions. I will teach my sons about what a vulva is, where the clitoris is, and why making love is more important than making porn. I vow to edify my sons and help them understand that their masculinity or femininity (because YES men have femininity in them as well) is not defined by the stereotypes and gross exaggerations, but are as unique as the finger prints on the people who bear them.. There are no “girl colors” or “boy colors”. These, dear boy, are just colors. We all have equal rights to them. I vow to teach them to be respectful and honest husbands and partners who know how to say “I’m sorry.”
I will teach my sons that love is love. People are people. NO matter what.
And.
Grace and Love (love for everyone) are the most important things.
I am raising sons to be men, and it is the most feminist expression of power that I have ever exercised.
Happy International Women’s Day!
YES YES YES!
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I want to rent a blimp, wrap it in this post, and let it fly around so everyone can read it. This is truth. And beautiful. And I’m so grateful, as the mother of a 2 year old daughter, that there will be at least 1 boy in the world that gets it.
Thanks Brandi! High praise from such an awesome writer
My son went to preschool with his fingers painted pink and another FOUR YEAR OLD boy called him a gay and wouldn’t play with him. The kid said that finger nail polish was for girls only, which led him to think Isaiah was gay (as if he knew what gay even was!) They start teaching their kids that shit real early…
I think love will win though.
Fantastic post!!! I shared it on the community blog Raising Boys World Facebook page : )
Thanks Tara!
This is WONDERFUL, Jasmine, and I’m so delighted to meet you via She Writes. Yours is a powerful pledge that I agree with 100%. I wish more boys were as fortunate as Isaiah and Tobias, to have a parent ensuring that they’ll have the tools to be healthy, respectful, critical thinking adults. Bravo, new friend!
Thanks SO much. What a lovely compliment!
Yay! I love, love, love this post. Who better to teach a boy how to love and respect women than the most important woman in his life. #aplauso
Thanks Ebony!
I like this article. I am the mother of a son and I agree that one of the most important things I must do is raise my son to be a good man who is respectful or and honors the women who will come into his life. On a side topic, your boys are such cutie pies!
Thank you! And Amen!